There are plenty of reasons not to lend money to family members, and people like to toss this advice around like it’s scripture. But let’s be honest, some of us might find it incredibly difficult to say no when cousins, aunts, uncles, nephews, brothers, sisters, parents, and others ask. After all, they’re family! Why would we say no?

Truth is, lending money is far more delicate than it sounds. When the other person fails to pay it all back it can cause huge rifts in your relationship and expose things you may have otherwise been blissfully unaware of. In some extreme cases, lenders often realize how often people take advantage of their kindness and this can have a domino effect of epic proportions.

Of course, in more mild cases the person might genuinely not be unable to pay you back even if you yourself happen to be in a pinch.

One thing’s for sure. Lending money to family can more often than not lead to drama, so it’s best to try and stay out of it, but not everyone can and not everyone wants to. So, if this is you and you’ve already agreed to help someone out, let’s look at four things that can help you out.