Great job! (to every little thing)
Unfortunately, this may go against your instincts, but you should hear us out before dismissing it. Psychologists that specialize in children’s behavior note that you should not tell your grandchildren, “Great job!” at every little thing they do well, as it will soon not mean anything to them. You will be seen as offering unwavering praise at anything, and they will soon no longer feel like they did something right but rather that you are just saying it at anything. What’s more, they will end up tuning you out when you praise them.
Instead, you should offer praise when it is warranted, and when you want to praise them for doing something right, even if it is small, you can offer it in a nonspecific way so that they know you appreciate their effort.
If they are drawing, for example, you can ask them about how they did it or ask them why they used colors together and tell them they work well together; that way they will understand you like what they did and that it is indeed a good job, but it will be more meaningful because you are showing interest in what they did, not just throwing out praise.
If you are worried that you will not know how to communicate effectively with your grandkids, it may be beneficial if you read more about the subject. The How To Talk Series books have a book about communicating with children, and you can get it on Amazon for only $11 on sale. It definitely changed how we talk to our grandkids for the better!
30 Responses
I’m not familiar with ap classes, but if they provide the benefits listed, I would encourage young people to participate in such a class.
AP classes are the more difficult classes. Also, if you’re in high school, those classes make a better impression on universities when you’re applying. They really do have better information on the subject matter.
In most cases, your initial statement hit my “yeah,but …” switch, but your expanded explanation or suggestions were decently on-target.
I WILL say, thst you must know your audience. For a prime example,”Because I said so. I’ll explain why after (whatever-,it-is) is over.” In sufficiently dire circumstances, sweet reason may take more time than you have.
I have said all of here phrases LoL I work with adolescents (teenage boys) the last 3 are definant shares used often.
You don’t know anything about kids. If you stop and communicate with them they CAN understand what you are talking about.
You have avery good point. That said, If you read their explanation, they mostly said the same as you. The suggestions they offered were generally not at all bad.
I grew up hearing these comments from my parents over my childhood. My parents do not have a relationship with their grandchildren or great grandchildren, they have a disrespect for children that I grew up with and unfortunately it extends to other members of the family. My mother is very negative about many areas in life. She complains about behaviors that people do and bugs them about the behaviors that they do. Like scratching too much irate my mother or coughing too much. She can be nerve-racking to be around when she is in these moods. Unfortunately, my mother does not do anything with her great grandkids. I see the INOGEN commercials, and I think unfortunately that is not my mother.
Well, i haven’t had a mother since I was 13….stop complaining
Wow. I was 14 when I lost mine.
How ignorant – anyone with common sense and respect would not use these phrases. I’m 82 and have a healthy relationship with grandkids and am always honest and straightforward, encouraging but not ridiculous. If anyone is still doing the things in this article, STOP!
Yess Nancy 💯 💯 💯 💯 💯 💯 absolutely I couldn’t agree with u more …I was just talking with my grandkids about my grandma last telling them that she prob would of scared them just by her voice if they were doing smthg they shouldn’t be LOL…but she would 🩵🩵🩵…them so so much & spoil them rotten just as she done myself & there mommy …i sure miss her dearly…she was the bestest friend ill ever have in my entire life …I love u grandma..rip 😘😘😘
I would give my life to see my only grandson 💙.
Unfortunately that will never happen. I’m pushing 75, and Haven see him since 1999. His Maternal family isn’t allowing it. Ever since his mother paralyzed my son for life. I miss him SO MUCH.
I understand…I haven’t seen my mother since I was 13
Your grandson is grown. Contact him yourself. For all you know his Maternal family may have told him you died when he was a baby. If he does not want to meet you then let it be. You could be pleasantly surprised. I would give it a try.
I completely agree. If he is an adult then it is his choice and not theirs whether he wants to see you or not. All he can tell you is yes or no.
So he is at least 25 now?
Sorry, but Nobody is keeping you from seeing him but you and him.
I Love this. These are precisely the areas I am consciously working on. I encourage my 7 grands to be kind, accepting of other’s opinions, and being kindest to your siblings, parents, and family. I regularly ask “would you speak like that to your friends? Your siblings are your first friends.”
You did n0t tell what you should not tell them you dont know your self because every body Re not the same.stop saying that.youall dont do nothing but give peoples the wrong messiage. Just tell themabout the creator .the father. Now you be Bless
yes the article DID provide what to say instead
All but one of them.
this ia all bs
In most cases, your initial statement hit my “yeah,but …” switch, but your expanded explanation or suggestions were decently on-target.
I WILL say, thst you must know your audience. For a prime example,”Because I said so. I’ll explain why after is over.” In sufficiently dire circumstances, sweet reason may take more time than you have.
Never tell ’em that the money is buried in the backyard…..right next to their real daddy.
Loved this updated advice! All so true about these “mixed signals advice”!
Me thinks some of these psychologists need a psychiatrist
The author says to never say, “If you cannot say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” The author adds, “This does not mean that you should let the kids in your family be rude.” Sorry. Wrong. This phrase is said to a smart aleck kid after they have made a particularly nasty comment. Like, “A 2 year old could do better!” Not for a neutral comment, like, “It’s OK.” It is ONLY used to stop cruel, insulting, comments. It is GOOD.
So, where are they? I’m not going to keep clicking endlessly……
personally i will say, that if its bad i’m guilty but i don’t think its bad
I don’t have grand kids, But I disagree about #3.
Wow! Four things someone SHOULD have told these people about how to write:
1. Grammar
2. Syntax
3. Spelling
4. ENGLISH